These are real things students have said to me.
"My dad said if I had brains I'd be dangerous. I don't even know what that means!"
"Do you know my phone number?"
"No, why would I?"
"I don't know - for times like this when I am trying to call my dad and I can't remember the number."
"Wow! The paperclip is stuck to the magnet."
"Yeah paperclips are metal."
"They are?!?"
"What did you think they were made of."
"I don't know. Aluminum."
(insert face palm) "Aluminum is also a metal."
"Even like tin foil?"
(face palm)
"My teacher told me I should write on the lines but it harms my artistic abilities."
While grading/revising an essay about Maya Angelou: The student was writing about how her book has helped many people: "Maya's story has helped many peoples self of steam."
I about fell out of my chair in laughter!
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